A Petty Woman

I have been blogging about my Taiwan trip for days and it seems that I am nowhere near finishing it. In the meantime, things do happen to me and my days were not stagnant.

On Monday, I nearly had my downfall. I boarded bus 185 with a full bladder and my bus was stuck in a jam in PIE. The bus was absolutely crawling along the expressway. My whole mind was occupied with willing the bus to move faster and to stop myself from squirting out my urine. It was really horrible. I was stuck in the jam alone for 30 mins. Try holding urine for 45 minutes to understand how I felt. I kept thinking, "Is this going to be my downfall? To urine in the public?" Luckily it never happened. *Huge sigh* I have learnt my lesson. Never board a bus with a full bladder; you never know what will happen.

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These days, I kept haunted by nasty thoughts. I felt that I was taken advantage of and was looked down on and yet I could do nothing. I wanted to bitch to my girlfriends but I felt that it would be mean to do so. Little little details of how selfish that person was kept coming to me in times when I was alone in my quiet room. Seriously, I feel that my esteem had taken a blow and is now slowly patching up, thanks to my Enemies.

It was through my Enemies that I found out that real friends will never put you down. Even if you are not that capable, not that strong, not that clever, they will never use words or actions to highlight your flaws. True friends even try to help you hide your flaw or turn it into something the two of you can joke about. In other cases, real friends learn to stick by you and learn new things together at the same pace, not trying to outdo each other. I have found such qualities in the six of them. And I am really glad to have them with me. Really.


Sometimes, I could see a bit of that person in me. Through that person, I can see how some of my actions are deterimental to someone's esteem and to our relationship and I don't like it. I don't want to treat my friends like this, just like I do not want to be treated like that. So, these days, I tend to be more careful in what I say and how I say. Maybe this is a blessing in disguise, turning me into a better person.


I just need some time to get over, to forget, maybe forgive, and move on.




Or I just need to bitch about it. =P Girlfriends, you there?


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