Hello, I'm back. It's nearly a year now since I last blogged. It is not that my life is boring and dry and I have nothing to blog about. So much have happened since January (when I last blogged). I've grown and matured in my thinking, my teaching, my view and even maybe my feelings.
Though I am just 21 years old, I feel like life is slipping away.... and there is nothing I can do. Somehow, I am not satisfied with a normal life. Get a job, married, have children, have grand children and then eventually die in an old folk's home... Life is so cliche, isn't it? Can I even call it a "life"?
I hope to do something out of the norm. Like going to Thailand and learn Muay Thai? Ride a bike? Climb Mount Everest? After getting to know my kick-boxing instructor, I suddenly have this yearning to lead the life she is leading. She is so cool and interesting, flying to different parts of the world to pursue her interest. I am just a primary school teacher and most probably I will teach till I die. What will be install in my life? Children whose behaviour deteriorates while their intelligence grow? Parents whose behaviour deteriorates while their wealth grow? I just cannot believe my life is going to take this path.....
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Reaching this age, suddenly I feel that other priorities are slowly taking over. For example, finding a mate? You may laugh, but these are some of the unusual (for me) thoughts I have to entertain everyday. I think I sounded desperate when I said that but I am not ashamed to admit it. We are human, animals, and the need to procreate is deeply ingrained in us. Ho! Now, I sounded cold-blood. But that is what "love" is about. I guess human beings have to find some noble and beautiful words to describe their actions, to differentiate us from animals, and "love" is just another cover for lust.
Great. This is my first entry since so many months and I sound so depressed and void of feelings. Forgive me. I have grown into a cynical person.
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